Wednesday, January 27, 2016

No. 2


Since I was a little kid, I've had lots of challenges. I didn't have a normal family. My parents went through a divorce. They were on heavy drugs and lots of drinking. (sorry mom and dad that are reading this, it's not shame on you, it's part of my story.)

I have 3 older brothers. An older sister. And a younger sister. Colton, Michael, Seth, Amanda and Annie. I love my siblings. A lot of people must think that I don't have siblings because I was adopted by my grandparents. But, yes, I do. My siblings and I grew up together while we were young. Up until I was about 9 or 10. Then my dad and step mom ran off to Oregon and left me behind because my grandparents wanted me. And I am so grateful for their help. But at the time, I was mad. I was left behind. All my siblings left for Oregon with mom and dad. And I didn't! They didn't want me! Or at least that's how I felt. I missed them. A lot.

While I was younger, a lot happened. And I truly won't get into details. But it was so hard. I started child therapy when I was 7. I went to a few, in fact. They had be pick out toys that represented the people in my life and I could either care for them or destroy them. And I always destroyed them. I was upset. I felt like I couldn't be taken care of because I was the one left behind.

My trials started at such a young age. I was overthinking. Not playing as much. I was angry. I felt like my own mom and dad left me because I was ugly, or too fat, or stupid or basically anything. I didn't like life too much.

So at a young age...this is where it all began...

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